Government Officials

Well hello there everyone - it's been a while since I have come across anyone I could put in the socially impaired and therefore 'bloggable' bracket' and today it happened. Thank God there are still people out there who are so dysfunctional in their expression of basic manners, otherwise what would I write about?

It was a standard Thursday for me today. Work was none-too-hectic which was a breath of fresh air and the revision I had done last night from a PDF of 600 moronic questions for my Driver Knowledge Test at the RTA was firmly imprinted on my brain, ready for my computerised exam at 1.30p.m.

Now I had dealt with these clowns before, so to give myself plenty of time I headed off just shy of 1 o clock to make sure I had my queue ticket and faculties together to take the test at half past. Lucky really, seeing as how I got the female version of Death as my RTA advisor. It went something like this:

Me: "Hi, I'm here as I have my DKT booked in for 1.30p.m. - sorry I am a bit early".
Satan: ...................................."hmphh"...............(slowly looking up).............................AND?"
Me: "Well, I came in and booked it about two weeks ago....with yourself actually".
Satan: "WELL - HAVE YOU GOT YOUR DOCUMENTS THEN????????????????????"

Fuck me - the fire she breathed nearly set light to my Pantene sprayed fringe.

Me: "Yes, here they are" (Fumbling around in my bag like passenger who had lost their air ticket with only seconds to catch a flight).

She snatched them off me, rifling through them in that manner as if to say 'I know there is going to be something wrong with the documentation you have provided, I just need to get my magnifying glass out to find it'.

What I find absolutely infuriating with these people is that they tell you you need certain documents etc - twice I have left that place and had to come back the next day with the 'relevant proof of ID' and twice they haven't even checked it the second time round. I don't get it - is 'Qualified Arsehole' part of the job description?

Anyway, there it was. The piece of information I so desperately needed in order to be able to take the test and not lose my booking fee. The signature page of my tenancy agreement. She went through each piece of evidence like a high court judge, making sure my brain was keeping up before sending me on my way to find someone who had known me for a year that had a full AUSTRALIAN driving license. So off I fucked, quickly since I had 15 mins to get this vital information before sitting the grand exam.

Bingo! My work colleague was sat at his desk and kindly whipped out his license and provided me with the signature that meant I could complete the procedure. Or so I thought. I ran back to the RTA wearing UGGs.

Upon my return, Satan was busy pissing someone else off - I thanked Jesus and prayed for someone a little less volatile. I got a Lobotomy casualty. I'd like to say we swiftly went through the document check but we didn't. After asking me my residential status at least five times and giving me the look that you'd only expect to get during a customs interrogation, she eventually set me up on a computer. The dude talking to me was charming. Shame he was a machine.

I breezed through the test, 45 out of 45. I am not bragging, but that was the easiest part of the whole experience. The final henchman I had to speak to was a woman who saw my score, got excited as she congratulated me although that lasted for a nano second, before she took me through the proverbial strip search once again.

I NEVER WANT TO GO BACK TO THAT PLACE AS LONG AS I LIVE!

I found an interesting link on how to deal with rude people following this afternoon's unecessary sequence of events. My favourite quote is "if you wrestle with a pig, you will stink":

http://www.helium.com/knowledge/109760-how-to-deal-with-rude-people